Curators of the Muesli Museum,

I like rain. I do not like getting wet but rain has always been one of my favourite weather phenomena. I like being undercover while it rains outside, it's somehow satisfying, this satisfaction emanates from my intense pride in the evolution of the human race and our ability to provide shelter for ourselves. This last sentiment lacks truth, perhaps I would be more proud if the human race had stayed in the caves and learned to adapt to lives with bats. Watching rain is hypnotic and calming, it brings on pensive and reflective moods. The chill rain brings to the air is refreshing. I inevitably open the windows when it rains so I can listen to its pitter-patter (that is an example of onomatopoeia) should I not be carrying out more important musicology. Many people moan about rain but it doesn't really rain so frequently in Fifecestershire but it would be an ordeal to cope with hosepipe bans and rationing like some areas of southern England or the extreme droughts experienced in many areas of the world. Magpies aren't seen so frequently in Fifecestershire either, it is very rare to see magpies anywhere east of Dunfermline, they aren't so keen on travelling along the A92.

Today, it rained. I also ventured to Kirkcaldy High Street to get some Mother's Day gift and get some passport-type photos of myself. Unfortunately, I end up buying more things that I would like and forget about the intended gifts. I bought a book "Moondust: In Search of the Men Who Fell to Earth", hopefully, it'll be great. I also bought some Woolworths weeds, some other books and some chocolates for the pathetic commercial celebration, mothers are always appreciated but the same applies for Mother's Day as does Christmas - one-off gestures solve nothing. I can be blunt, but not James Blunt, however I may sing better, but haven't tried, although I can safely predict that my versions would probably sound more like the William Shatner versions. My passport photos were a disaster, 3 out of 4 cut of the top of my head as I could not lower the seat any more and it did not go low enough, this is disappointing as I am clearly within the 95th percentile. Passport photos always make people look as though they are criminals, my case was not helped as I had chosen to wear the jumper that makes me look like a baddie from a James Bond filum today.

In the muso spot, today's Rocket Science featured a brilliant archive session from Bright Eyes. It always amazes me how I really like the sound of something, buy it, listen to it for a while and then go looking for the next thing. Upon hearing the same artist again after a while, I then get blown away all over again, Bright Eyes had that effect on me today and Simple Kid did so last week. I also lishened to The Kooks' album "Inside the Inside Out" for the first time; it's been out for a while, I had thought of them as just another unoriginal indie band, but new single "Naive" has converted me, it's really catchy, a truly great song is one which I can never be bored of, and given its abundance of airplay, it has so far stood the test. I shouldn't have doubted The Kooks. It was one of the albums Iain Banks recommended on his slot on Rocket Science, he seems to be a brilliant musicologist and I can't say I've ever been disappointed when I've bought one of the albums he's praised.

The accompanying picture shows some people on a mound of earth.