Long Ball Larry and the Shovelfeet,

I construct the occasional post about East Fife FC. Dave Baikie has to be sacked now, he’s bought too many duffers – they’re not duffers, they’re just not our type of player; we need Long Ball Larrys. This was evident on Saturday when they gave up trying to pass the ball properly and resorted to the classic East Fife way: the lumping of the ball. Despite being beaten 2-1 by Arbroath, it was quite enjoyable; the chants from the crowd were funny and the events on the pitch equally so; in what must be an SFL first, the East Fife physio was sent to the stand.

Tonight, Celtic play AC Milan in the Round of 16 of the UEFA Champion’s League. They could do worse than adopt that classic East Fife strategy, they ought to put a couple of big lads up front and boot the ball vaguely towards them. My tactics would rule out a place for hapless Kenny Miller; it was quite funny seeing him sat on the bench on Saturday with his wee glum face and the big cartoon bump on his forehead after his collision with the linesman whilst warming up.

I’ve always like Meelan as my European side, I adopted them when I was gloryhunting in the 90s and followed their exploits from afar since then. It’s going to be great to see them in Scotland again. I’m not really fussy about the score, I can’t afford not to enjoy the match at that ticket price.